Time to lighten the load here:

[EvilWayz]

Man walks into a bar full of people.

He pulls out gun and starts waving it around and says "I've got a Colt 1911 here, holds 7 in the magazine and one in the pipe, and I want to know who's been sleeping with my wife! "

From the back of the bar, a voice says:

"Hope you brought more ammo! "

 

[instaGATOR]

As the iG wipes coffee splatter off his screen....

 

[gatordad3]

I'm getting dizzy just watching this. Which one of you fools are psycho enough to do this?

 

[instaGATOR]

Raise your hand if you've ever taken a ride on a floor buffer.... (iG raises his hand) 😁 And I have no excuse, being sober at the time....

 

[gatordad3]

I just realized this guy is a UF alum.

 

[BillCutting4585]

I just realized this guy is a UF alum.

Is this cucky in the flesh?

L for love 😂😂😂

 

[instaGATOR]

What would you hear at a very long opera about aliens? Aria 51.

What do you call an alien with three eyes? An aliiien.

And for us older Dads...
What do you call an overweight E.T.? Extra Cholesterol.

 

[BamaFan1137]

Patrick O'Sullivan from Boston dies and goes to Heaven. He meets Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter tells him, "It's getting full in here, you have to tell me a joke and make me laugh if you want in."

Patrick says, "What did my first sexual experience and my funeral have in common?"

Saint Peter, "I don't know?"

Patrick, "I was the only one who came."

Saint Peter, "That's not funny."

Patrick, "I'm just kidding...my priest did too."

 

[Capt Ron 1]

A Skeleton walks into a bar...orders a beer and a mop.................

 

[instaGATOR]

Capt, My favorite skeleton is Achmed, the dead terrorist.... 😁

 

[instaGATOR]

How do aliens harvest their crops?
With tractor beams.

How do you make an alien’s baby sleep?
You rocket.

 

[gatordad3]

 

[gatordad3]

I found @nail1988 and @BamaFan1137 😝

Ciddi misin. on Instagram: "Maks Eğlence Bu Olmalı... #kesfett #kesfetteyizz #keşfetteyiz #benionecikar #keşfetteyim #keşfettengelenlertakipetsin #keşfet #kesfettengelenler #kesfetteyim #kesfetteyiz"

1M likes, 2,744 comments - ciddi.olamazsiniz on January 10, 2023: "Maks Eğlence Bu Olmalı... #kesfett #kesfetteyizz #keşfetteyiz #benionecikar #keşfetteyim #k..."

www.instagram.com

 

[gatordad3]

 

[BamaFan1137]

I found @nail1988 and @BamaFan1137 😝

Ciddi misin. on Instagram: "Maks Eğlence Bu Olmalı... #kesfett #kesfetteyizz #keşfetteyiz #benionecikar #keşfetteyim #keşfettengelenlertakipetsin #keşfet #kesfettengelenler #kesfetteyim #kesfetteyiz"

1M likes, 2,744 comments - ciddi.olamazsiniz on January 10, 2023: "Maks Eğlence Bu Olmalı... #kesfett #kesfetteyizz #keşfetteyiz #benionecikar #keşfetteyim #k..."

www.instagram.com

It was a few years ago but I've definitely been in that race before. 😂

 

[gatordad3]

 

[instaGATOR]

What's the difference between a Vacuum Cleaner and a motorcycle?

With a Vacuum, the 'Dirtbag' rides on the inside....

😲 -- 😁 -- 😂

 

[gatordad3]

This is more like @nail1988 😝

 

[gatordad3]

This is what my ex wife did to my Honda Accord just over 20 years ago.

 

[gatordad3]

 

[gatordad3]

This Guy walks into a Gay bar and this happens🤣🤣🤣#lol #joke

youtube.com

 

[gatordad3]

 

[gatordad3]

 

[NavigatorII]

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Blast from the past! I still like Journey's music, one of the best singers of rock n roll history, Steve Perry. You made me look up Milli Vannilli. I had forgotten that nonsense. One of the guys I looked into "where are they now". Several sites have his net worth at 250k. 😂

 

[EvilWayz]

Blast from the past! I still like Journey's music, one of the best singers of rock n roll history, Steve Perry. You made me look up Milli Vannilli. I had forgotten that nonsense. One of the guys I looked into "where are they now". Several sites have his net worth at 250k. 😂

And the other one is dead.

 

[NavigatorII]

And the other one is dead.

"How to become a thousandaire" Not sing your actual stuff. I looked into that more because previously I never GAF or listened to them. Their manager was a POS. They actually wanted to sing their stuff and they contractually were forbidden. Not sure if it would have mattered, they might have sucked anyway. Still looking for reasons to care. 😂

 

[gatordad3]

Straight up Yo ass!

 

[NavigatorII]

Straight up Yo ass!

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Robert Downey Jr looks like he might like it. 😂

 

[gatordad3]

Robert Downey Jr looks like he might like it. 😂

That was bsc and mdf asking me for some scotch.

 

[instaGATOR]

The laughs come by watching the many different faces of those reacting to her performances.... At just 9 Year old,,, Angelina Jordan, arranges, writes, sings and entertains far beyond her age.



Just in case you want a double 2nd opinion....



BTW, English is not her 1st language, she's Norwegian, but she now speaks 5 languages.
And she Won Norway's Got Talent at 7 years old singing Billy Holiday's 'Gloomy Sunday.'

Performed Queen's 'Bohemian Rhapsody' at 13 years old on AGT getting a Golden Buzzer.
Looking into her history is much like going down the 'Rabbit Hole' so beware....

 

[instaGATOR]

Why did the trans only eat salads?

Because he was a herbefore.... 😳 😵 😁

 

[BamaFan1137]

Where do trans people get their pizza from?

Little xe/xers

 

[instaGATOR]

I told myself that I needed to stop drinking.

But I'm not going to take any advice from a guy that talks to himself..... 😉

 

[nail1988]

Dad triggers soy Cuck son

 

[EvilWayz]

Dad triggers soy Cuck son

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That's not funny.

Also, staged.

 

[EvilWayz]

"Bravo One this is Tango Four Two, we got twelve nuns in the gap--they need some holy water. How copy, over?"

"Tango Four Two this is Bravo One, I read you licken chicken, over."

--Actual CAS call. I love the military.

 

[BamaFan1137]

That's not funny.

Also, staged.

I've also heard this "kid" has passed away.

 

[BamaFan1137]

Not sure it's accurate fwiw but it's definitely staged.

 

[KearsedGator42]

A guy walks into a bar...and he was disqualified from the limbo contest

A Termite walks into a bar. Looks up and down the bar and says “Hey where’s the Bartender?”

 

[NavigatorII]

A Termite walks into a bar. Looks up and down the bar and says “Hey where’s the Bartender?”

??? You meant "where's the bar?" "confused gaze"