Dang Bama, I almost spit a mouthful of hamburger out on my desk reading that.... 😁
That reminded me of when I was taking my son (about 14) on a fishing trip to Spruce Creek near Daytona. We were driving by the Speedway (500) at daylight and there was a line of 8-10 police cars in the turn lane waiting to go into the track.
I had bought us a bag of Sweet-16 white powdered dognutts that were sitting on the seat between us. I told my son to hang them out the window and shake the bag to see if anyone wanted one. He got that confused/amused expression on his face, not realizing that I was joking and started to do it. I grabbed his arm and said 'never-mine' as I didn't want to be late getting to the creek. We have both laughed about it several times since then... I almost,,, almost wish I had let him do it..... 😉
Unless they were pr1cks, they would have laughed.
Unacceptable answers to the cop when you're pulled over...
1. Do you know why I pulled you over?
Well...I don't seem to have any doughnuts so...no.
2. Where are you going that you need to drive so fast?
Ummm...your wife's house!
3. Why are you driving so fast?
I'm trying to keep up with traffic.
There isn't any traffic.
I know...that's how far behind I am.
4. A cop pulled me over and asked me, “Where were you between 5 and 6?”
“Kindergarten
This one is long but it owned me...
A mature (over 40) lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer : Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer : Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer : Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer : I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer : Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer : Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer : You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer2 : Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.